I think I'm probably too tired to write this post, however I'm going to do it anyhow.
First of all I want to thank the Universalist Fellowship of the Sacred path - my fellow clergy and friends there who are supportive of me and my journey (as I am equally supportive of them). It's amazing how we have all been on such spiritual pilgrimages. We exchange stories and thoughts and ideas - as varied as we are in our own religious convictions, we share in one thing - we don't easily fit into a predetermined religious framework. My biggest thanks to Bishop Mansell Gilmore who does such an amazing job of supporting us all.
I go through cycles of varied beliefs and understandings. It looks on the outside like a complete 360, however each time I come round in that circle I have something new I've learned that I've brought with me.
I don't know why it should surprise me that I go in circles. After all, our life is a spiral that circles inward, and circles outward. Ebbing and flowing, waxing and waning.
I realized that although I can walk only one path at a time on my journey homeward, that I require different tools. Sometimes the journey is rocky and steep and sometimes it is flat and open. The tools I use reflect the place I am traveling through during that time.
By trying to combine my Earth-Based understandings and relationships with my Episcopalian/Anglican nature, I was watering down both. Sometimes you simply can NOT use one tool for the other.
I need both in my life.
So I decided to create two tool sets for the journey.
Divinaturist Wicca - an Eclectic Wiccan path
Sacred Path Fellowship - a Progressive Christian path
As I have said in earlier posts, although I see a butting of heads amongst those two paths if we are talking to Fundies (both Christian and Pagan/Wiccan) , I do not see a contradiction in general at all.
There is much merit in visualizing and relating to the Lord and Lady in the way Wicca does things. There is also a large feel of 'Malkut' to it, as we operate in this realm and realize the divinity in the world that comes to us from within (and as) the elements. The wheel representing the Seasons, the Life Stages, and various other syncretic aspects.
Likewise there is much to be gained for many from within the Christian tradition, especially the Esoteric and Progressive variants. Wisdom from the Christian Mystics, Gnostic myths about Sophia and the Logos, shared experiences of humanity found in Psalms.
There is much richness in both the above paths and I will not chose between them.
Now, traveling back into time a bit. I had been accused by members of the Pagan community of being 'too Christian' , and I will admit that that was a reason I folded up my work with my Circle of the Eternal Sun , Divinaturist group. I allowed those accusations to affect me. I heard a story of a girl who had come to our local Coffee Cauldron and the amazement (and displeasure) upon finding out that she was in fact Christian. So, the fact that I had such an interest in Esoteric Christianity and Mysticism (Judaic Mysticism as well) made me think 'maybe it was time to leave Wicca behind completely' and I did. I went ahead with my Christian interests, being an ordained Minister within the UFSP , and took classes from the Metropolitan Theological Seminary.
Still though, my love and understanding of Wicca was strong and found it's way into my Christian liturgy that I was creating. In that process the service lost some of the depth that drew me to it in the first place it didn't express the meaning behind it well. Nor could the Wiccan aspects be fully appreciated. It became something that offered little to a Christian OR an Earth-Based sort.
The light went on.
I realized that both have their place and indeed I myself need both.
I am not just climbing mountains, nor am I just wandering through the plains. This journey takes me through both and I require the tools of Mysticism as found within Christianity, Judaism and Gnosticism as well as the tools of Celebration and Relationship found within Wicca.
Anyhow - if this made sense, awesome. If it didn't , that's awesome too.
In Lux et Veritas!