October 7th will be two years. Two years that she has been gone. I can't say I 'had' a daughter. That seems like such blasphemy. The correct term to me is 'HAVE' a daughter. But she is no longer huggable. I can no longer hear her laughter or her voice. I can't look forward to any more of her accomplishments because there are none. Autumn again, and it's the same smell in the air. The same quirky wind and dampening light. The time of year I have always loved. Now it's also the time of year that I remember the knock on my door. The face that uttered words telling me she was gone. Autumn décor goes up, as does a sense of dread. Macabre song of leaves in the trees. This year also has included the end of my marriage. Though truthfully it ended long ago, it took a long time to realize that there was no light to sustain it. Just angry words and poison. Seeds from the harvest, in fruit that is past its time, Sink into the earth. From the decay comes life they
I've done pretty good with staying offline. I've reduced my time by about 80%. I just need to narrow down my time on here to quality activities. Blog updates and Spiral Inward message board :D (http://spiralinward.com) My icons from Istok.net arrived. Very beautiful. Ill add pics tomorrow. Our first official Mater Amabilis Narthex is tomorrow. There are three confirmed other than myself. Im pleased with that number. Good things start small. It gives us a chance to get to know each other and to get a good idea of where we want to go with this. I saw my boy tonight. My one who is with his dad right now. I went to watch his lacrosse game with my husband. It was a 4-4 tie and I was so stressed watching those last minutes I thought I was going to hyperventilate. LOL. It was 4-4 almost the whole last period. I hope he and I can work things out. If he wants to. I understand that maybe we just can't live together. He's almost 16 and all his life, behaviour has been a struggle.
But a post nontheless. Blogging is a good way to keep track of time and events in my life, especially because I have a bad memory. So, let's see.... my son is selling e-cigarettes (one of my older sons), I bought my 3.5 year old new Thomas Train boots. My 2 year old was jealous, but he has some prett awesome Lightening Mc Queen boots, so I just cleaned and buffed his up a bit, and now he thinks they're new too :D. My dad and grandparents came over yesterday... oh! and hubby and I had some wine to celebrate High Spring. We watched The Dark Knight ,because believe it or not, we hadn't watched it yet. I really liked it. Dying my hair today, the greys are taking over.... hm. What else? Found an awesome place on SL in a region that is part of the Eternity Sims. 50L per week. Tiny place, but the area is beautiful, the cabin is well done, and it has a day/night set that switches places with the touch of a button. I love the peeps in Eternity. Hopefully I will start in
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