Crazy World

So much craziness.

I often wonder what it would be like to be internet-less. Shut down my online store, place an away email reply message , plug the actual house phone in, (I always unplug it and then forget about it.) and take a hiatus.

The internet super-highway.

All the information you will ever want it seems, and much more than you ever need. (kind of like Wal-Mart)

It makes it harder to remain mindful, to remain connected to spirit and disconnected from the material world when checking email and facebook activity multiple times per day. I’m not saying that the material world is bad. It has its place most definitely.

I see nature around me and the changing seasons as a reflection of my inner self. I’m not the kind of Witch that worships God and Goddess so-and-so, and who has visions of celtic divas in long gowns dancing the dance of fertility with her horned god. I mean, I use imagery like that as personifications of aspects of me. Not as separate deities. The elements all represent parts of me as well, the times of the year are reminders for me to take an internal check … birth of the year, growing ideas, spiraling outward, then coming in again, looking inside myself, contemplation….

So, as I say, the material world in that sense has a definite place. Especially that which is not made of man. Windy beaches, mist laden valleys, lush green forests and vast plains… beautiful…..And even the material world that is made by man is useful. It teaches us lessons to strenthen the spirit. It offers us the chance to experience tastes, smells, feelings, sounds… But it is SO easy to get caught up in that. The material world of man.

Especially when controversy is abound.

Vaccinate! Don’t Vaccinate! is the theme right now and I am soooo tired of it.

Do what you want but don’t preach. I don’t even care if you base your opinions on false information. Nope. I mean if you BUG me and ask me what my opinion is, I might share it, but otherwise, I just can’t care. Really… can’t! It does me no good to care about everyone’s personal opinion on it. Just brings about a big headache.

Every single thing in the man made world can be traced back to a conspiracy of some sort. This is why I prefer to pick and choose my battles.

Can I PROVE that something is a certain way? And do I think that by arguing my opinion against someone JUST as certain of their views that suddenly they will gasp in enlightenment and say “REALLY???? OH WOW! You have TOTALLY changed my mind!”

Nope.

Isn’t going to happen. People have their own opinions and that’s just it. By nature, man is a greedy, power hungry sort. Animals in general are quite territorial. Mine. Gimme! Do I think that the government is out to get me? So what if it is. I have known good people who have tried to get into politics. And what if they had made it? Would they have been suddenly assimilated into the Lizard People society and rendered complete power hungry assholes? Maybe….. but oh well.

I could walk out of my house tomorrow, cross the street and get hit by a car and die. My five children would lose a mom. My husband would lose his wife and best friend. Often, as much as I say I DONT CARE, I find myself on these sites where people are arguing about this or that and I end up stepping on in, because that little part of me that needs to be heard… that needs to be right… that identifies itself with the ideas it holds , just won’t shut the hell up. Sigh.

But that is not who I want to be. Or who I truly am. I am far more than my opinion. And above all, I find that in many ways, the internet is a friend and foe. It helps that insecure part of me become more world-based. I am my blog. I am my avatar. I am my signature at the end of my posts. Strip all of it away, that created identity, and who am I?

In the mornings, I do a small ritual, at my altar, and as a part of it, I ask the Logos within me to grace me with knowledge, and I ask Sophia, the Holy Mother within (as within, so without) to grace me with the ability to understand. The rest of my morning ritual is personal and I will not share it here, but needless to say-in this brief morning activity, while greeting the dawn- I feel true identity. My spark is far away from home right now, but at least it is beginning to find it’s way back to it.

And I find that the negative chaos of human nature , that which I allow and even embrace in my life, squelches that spark. Makes it harder for it to glow and shine and warm me from within. I am not saying that dealing with people is a bad thing. I am just saying that when one gets caught up in dramatics and speculations and accusations, that the true plight of personal spiritual enlightenment -our own personal relationship with our Divine- gets harder to achieve. Gnosis becomes further out of reach.

When we are more particular and mindful about what and who we spend our energy on, it is more likely that we will engage in more fulfilling experiences that help to fan that Sacred Flame, rather than suffocate it.

So, one day, I might get brave and shut off the computer for a few weeks.

In the meantime, I am going to resist the temptation to allow myself to get drawn into situations that only stimulate my lower self.

In Love & Light,

Me!